When I found out my son wasn’t really mine, I took him out of my will.

David has always thought that his family was strong. Their only son, Jake, who just turned 18, has been the center of their lives for many years. David had always been proud of being a loving dad who helped Jake grow up and deal with life as an adult. But Linda recently told him something shocking that turned his whole world upside down and made him make a very hard choice.

David told us his story.

David said “Hello” at the start of his letter. It’s crazy to think that I’d be here, questioning everything I thought I knew about my family. Linda, my wife, and I have been married for 30 years. Our son Jake has always been the best thing in our lives. We were excited to see him become an adult, full of promise and potential, since he just turned 18.

My friendship with Linda has always been strong. There have been hard times for us over the years, but we’ve always been there for each other. I had no idea what Linda was going to say when she recently came up to me with a serious look on her face. “She said she had to talk about something important that she had been putting off for a long time,”

His wife told him something he didn’t expect.

David went on, “Linda admitted that Jake isn’t really mine.” She told me she cheated on me with her ex-boyfriend before we got married. Plus, she didn’t tell me she was pregnant until after we were married. To keep it a secret, she said she was scared and confused at the time. She hoped no one would find out.
Linda told me she had never seen her ex-boyfriend again. ‘Why are you telling me this now?’ I asked, broken. She told me she wasn’t going to tell me this ever, but something made her.

“His biological dad had died,” she said. Linda got a letter in the mail a few weeks ago. It came from the lawyer for her ex-boyfriend. He told her in the letter that he had just recently learned about Jake and that, before he died, he had planned to leave Linda and Jake a large inheritance. The lawyer said that her ex-boyfriend wanted to make sure Jake was taken care of, even though they had never met.

David was hurt and didn’t know what to do.

David said, “I felt like the ground had been ripped out from under me when Linda told me this.” What I heard made no sense to me. After 18 years, I really thought Jake was my son in every way. Whenever he took his first steps, went to school, or learned how to drive, I was there for him. Now that I know he’s not biologically mine, it breaks my heart.

Linda told me she didn’t want to hide this from me any longer, especially since it had to do with an inheritance. We had to face the truth and decide what to do next as a group. I didn’t know what to do, though. I felt hurt, angry, and lost. It made me want to leave, to shut down, and leave it all behind. I knew Jake was still the same kid I loved and raised for 18 years, though.

David made the choice to take Jake out of his will.

David went on, “In the days that followed, I started to doubt everything.” What did Linda do to hide this from me? Is this going to change the way I feel about Jake? I know he’s not my biological son, but he’s my son in every other way. But the hurt I felt was too strong to ignore. I made the hard choice to take Jake out of my will because I thought that he would be financially secure with the money he would get from his biological father.

But I knew it wasn’t about the money even as I made my choice. It had to do with trust being broken and the sudden doubts I had about the life I thought I had. Linda says she did what she thought was right at the time, but I think she really feels terrible about what she did. But now I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to get over this and rebuild the trust that was broken.

David has mixed feelings about his son right now.

“Jake still doesn’t know the whole story, and I’m not sure if I should tell him or not,” David said. I don’t want to put this on him right now, when he’s just starting his own life. He’s almost an adult. However, I believe he should be told the truth, even if it hurts.

I don’t know what to do next. Or am I letting my feelings get in the way of making the right choice? What should I do?”

What do you think should be done in this case?

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