Jennifer was a single mom who felt a lot of different emotions at her daughter Lily’s 10th birthday party. Jennifer made a brave choice because she wanted Lily to be happy and felt bad about her ex-husband’s new partner. Now, she goes online to find help in understanding what will happen because of her choice.
“Hey,
I need help with something that happened recently that has me confused. Lily, my daughter, just turned 10, and we had a great party for her. For Lily’s sake, I’ve always tried to make sure she has a great relationship with her dad, who used to be my husband. He’s been seeing someone new for about a year now. I respect his personal life, but I’ve never felt good about this new partner being around Lily.
I made it clear on the invitations for Lily’s birthday that it would be a small, family-only get-together. I was shocked when my ex called to say he was going to bring his new partner with him. I tried to stay calm, but I told him very clearly that she wasn’t invited. He was very angry and hung up on me.
The party day came, and my ex showed up by himself. His face showed that he was angry, but he kept it together for Lily’s sake. The party went well, and Lily and her family and friends had a great time. But as soon as the last guest left, my phone started ringing nonstop. Social media was where my ex’s new partner aired our dirty laundry and accused me of being mean and controlling. People I knew and friends started getting in touch with me. Some were supportive, while others questioned my choice.
There has been a huge backlash. My ex is very angry because his partner’s posts about me have made me look bad. It’s always been important to me to look out for my daughter’s best interests, but now I’m questioning what I did. Did I go too far? Should I have just let her come in to keep things calm?
I’m having a hard time with guilt and doubt. What should I say to my ex and his partner about this? How can I tell Lily about my choice if she hears it from someone else? I need help figuring out how to move on with my life and fix these broken relationships while still being true to myself.
Sincerely, Jennifer”
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