In today’s story, things get more tense when a daughter-in-law has to deal with her mother-in-law’s hurtful comments. As we talk about family relationships, societal expectations, and the question of who is right, we invite you to join us.
She told what took place.
A few months ago, my husband and I had our first child. He and I are so happy, and I love our little bundle so much. My family has been very helpful. They’ve brought us dinner and made sure we had time to nap while we got used to being parents.
In a lot of ways, my family and his family are not the same. Since they live 20 minutes away, they didn’t want to come see us and instead wanted us to come to them. They also didn’t want to offer much support after the birth. We didn’t mind, and we brought our baby over about three times a month when we could.
When my MIL had her first child, she talked about how important it was to her to “lose the baby weight” after the first month. I didn’t think much of it at first; I thought she was just talking about how she felt, which a lot of people do when they are around babies. She then said nice things about my baby’s round cheeks and how much they look like mine. Even though it hurt a little, I let it go again.
The last straw was when my husband casually told her that I wanted to start running again and that we were going to make it work since our baby is very attached to me. “Are you thinking about trying to run?” she asked in a loud voice. Don’t you think you should start by walking?” His whole family was there and was waiting for me to answer. I used to run a lot but stopped while I was pregnant, and what she said hurt a lot.
Hearing mean things about my body or my abilities hurts. I knew she talked badly about other people’s bodies behind their backs, but I didn’t think she would be so mean to me in front of me. I’m not skinny by any means, but I live a healthy, active life, so I shouldn’t worry about my weight.
This is where I think I went too far. I no longer want to see her. That person makes me feel bad about myself, and my husband fully supports this. His mom is mad because she thinks it’s unfair that we’re going to keep her grandchild away from her. He goes there by himself, but it’s hard for me to go with him because our baby only drinks breast milk and won’t take any kind of bottle.
