Keeping secrets in a relationship is often a sign of a “dissatisfying, distrustful, and distant relationship,” but it’s not always the cause of it. Unfortunately, secrets get in the way of a lot of marriages. A woman was shocked when she learned that her husband had been keeping important facts about his past from her. She told us the whole story.
Something has turned my world upside down, and I’d really appreciate some help figuring out how to deal with it all.
When I was cleaning the house the other day, I knocked my husband’s diary off a high shelf by accident. I picked it up and saw that it had opened to a random page. The lock had broken when it hit the ground. I read a few sentences that told me something about my husband I didn’t know before because I was interested.
It turns out that my husband was married before, and sadly, his first wife died while giving birth to their child. None of this was known to me. I didn’t even know he had been married before, let alone lost a wife and child. It hit me like a ton of bricks, and I’m still trying to figure it out.
There’s something else that’s even stranger.
My husband has always been very clear that he doesn’t want kids. Even though he’s great with kids and I want to start a family, he’s still not interested in having children. However, what I know about his past helps to explain things. He doesn’t want to have kids. Could it be because he’s afraid of losing another loved one?
I haven’t told my husband what I found yet, and I’m not sure if I should. There are parts of me that think I should respect his space and not tell anyone about this. Somehow, I think that talking about it with him might help us understand each other better and might even make me change my mind about starting a family.
Should I tell my husband what I found in his diary, or should I keep it to myself? Finally, what should I say to him if I do decide to talk to him about it? I need to be careful and sensitive in how I handle this sensitive situation, but I don’t know where to begin.
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